Alfonso Soriano and the Kaplan Conspiracy

LIfe is better when the Cubs win, but failure has a way of stoking a Cub fan's creativity, doesn't it? This dramatic reinterpretation of a call into David Kaplan's post-game "Tenth Inning" show is the work of WGN listener Edwardo, who was clearly inspired by Comedy Central's "Crank Yankers."

Comments

Wow. Kaplan isn't taking the canceling of Sports Central well.

No biggie. Kap wasn't very enjoyable after Tom Waddle left the show anyway. I do give him credit for airing a lot of Baseball Prospectus guys, though.

I also give him credit for having a panel of Cub bloggers on with him this past spring on Sports Central, including Andy from desipio.com, who has ripped on Kaplan often, enthusiastically, and to great comic effect.

To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan. Except maybe Les Grobstein, and Les is a different kind of sports radio guy. In fact, I think he is another species altogether.

"To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan."

Tall midgets are still rather short.

He should have gotten them on with Ruben Amaro. The Phillies just made a guy who has ranked 27th and 49th among offensive players over the last two years the NL's highest paid player. Chase Utley must be salivating.

Moly Holy, that's a big contract to a big man. What will Prince Fielder get in free agency now?

A lot of green, that's for sure.

Vegan joke!!

Now there's something I never thought I would see: The word "inspired" in the same sentence as Comedy Central's Crank Yankers.

Long hair on Kaplan. :) haha

ss theriot, 2b baker, 1b lee, cf byrd, 3b ramirez, lf soriano, c soto, rf colvin, p silva

lefty going tonight in Lannan...

Maybe they're just trying to find playing time for Colvin? It doesn't seem like the best way to do it, but the Cubs have a surprising surplus of everyday outfielders right now.

Seeing if he can hit lefties I guess.

Pretty small sample size.

I just read somewhere that Lannan is AWFUL against lefties. Lefties are hitting over 500 against him, and righties are at about 250...
I wish I remembered where I read that... Obviously Lou didn't read it...
P.S. Here it is...
http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/gameday/index.jsp?gid=...

well if Lou read that, he'd play Fukudome, Colvin and Fontenot then today...

Wow. Just looked up his career splits:
in 1451 PAs by RHB: .257/.328/.384
in 463 PAs by LHB: .291/.357/.501

But the BABIPs are very different, .267 by RHB and .320 by LHB. How does that work when looking at pitchers? And the BB:K totals are more what you'd expect, 132:146 by RHB and 35:79 by LHBs, obviously LHB striking out much more frequently given the less than 1/3 as many PAs.

[Edit: He's really been rocked by lefties so far this year. Only 26 PAs, but .542/.538/.792 line for a 1.330 OPS. He's had reverse splits every year so far, which would seem to indicate the BABIP is the result of his pitching and not the result of luck.]

I was going to check Fangraphs for pitch types, then realize those are rarely accurate.

I believe Lannan's best pitch is his change-up, that tends to be down and in on a lefty in their happy zone, hence the troubles (possibly or it's just bad luck).

See how many breaking balls he throws Colvin I guess...

1. Nyjer Morgan, CF
2. Adam Kennedy, 3B
3. Cristian Guzman, 2B
4. Adam Dunn, 1B
5. Josh Willingham, LF
6. Ivan Rodriguez, C
7. Ian Desmond, SS
8. Willy Taveras, RF
9. John Lannan, P

Guzman batting 3rd, commence laughter

http://sports.espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/news/st...

Z says he was assured stay in pen is temporary until a trade can be made...

Z for Vernon Wells?

Har.

I wonder if Ryan Howard's new contract means that Hendry will let D Lee go after next year and try to swing a trade for Ryan Howard. I'm trying to think of an equally bad contract the Cubs have (scratches head).

you realize that scenario makes no sense. If the Phils wanted to move Howard, you don't sign him to an untradeable contract.

Oh, I know it doesn't make sense.

Makes no sense to me. I'd rather have Vernon Wells or Soriano under contract than Ryan Howard for 25 per year.

Probably at least a 10 million per year overpay.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/worklife/04/24...

If Lackey misses any significant time due to surgery on a pre-existing elbow injury during the first five years of the contract, the Red Sox gain a club option for the 2015 season in which Lackey would have to pitch for the major league minimum salary.

among others...

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

He pitched well tonight - I am sure it's not really, but it seems like the first 8th inning of the year that we didn't give up a run.

Just 2.5 back now with 142 to play!

Hoochie mamma!

~ata boy, Lloyd!~

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  • The official police report on Chapman:

    https://www.scribd.com/document/292708682/Chapman-...

    You can draw your own conclusions.

    Old and Blue 1 hour 40 min ago view
  • Where is he going to play for the Cubs?

    Rob Richardson 2 hours 7 min ago view
  • That was, ummmm, you know. A joke?

    Old and Blue 2 hours 12 min ago view
  • Even from an on-field perspective, Torres is a 19-year-old beating up High-A pitching who also plays a great SS. Even if he never develops a legit MLB power stroke, he's still an obvious 4-tool guy with a very high floor. Sucks to trade away his next 6-8 years for a closer, albeit a great one.

    John Beasley 3 hours 41 min ago view
  • "Like the Chapman deal for Cubs from on-field POV, wish I didn't now have to feel lousy following an otherwise likable Cubs team." @jonahkeri

    pretty much sums up my feelings

    Rob G. 9 hours 50 min ago view
  • You mean Yankees?

    QuietMan 9 hours 54 min ago view
  • Cards lose!

    billybucks 10 hours 1 min ago view
  • You do have a point. The TheoJed certainly would need to address this in a transparent way. Milton Bradley was no help to the team.

    The E-Man 10 hours 14 min ago view
  • FWIW, the Cubs would get a compensation draft pick between the 1st & 2nd rounds (around #35) if they extend a Qualifying Offer to Chapman post-2016 (probably about $17M), Chapman declines, and then he signs with another MLB club before next year's draft. 

    Arizona Phil 10 hours 20 min ago view
  • This all assumes Chapman doesn't want to be a free agent and possibly sign a $20MM+/year deal. We all know free agents get overpaid, sometimes dramatically (Hello, JayHey!). Not sure why Chapman would agree to the extension. If i'm is agent, I would tell him I could get I'm a $100M deal as a FA.

    billybucks 10 hours 27 min ago view
  • I'll root for the uniform and imagine it's left-handed Rod Beck or Randy Myers out there I suppose.

    Rob G. 10 hours 51 min ago view
  • Amen to this. I guess it's gonna happen and I'm gonna have to suck it up but I really despise domestic abusers with every bone in my body and cannot stand them on any team I root for.

    johann 10 hours 59 min ago view
  • I just prefer they don't  acquire players that choke their wives/girlfriends.

    Rob G. 11 hours 3 min ago view
  • So you'd rather go with Blown Save guy, when you can trade a prospect who is blocked for one piece that could get you over the top to the Big Dance? That is pretty old thinking. This is not a move that they cannot recover from if it goes south. But the upside is potentially historic.

    The E-Man 11 hours 12 min ago view
  • I'd prefer it not happen too.

    Rob G. 11 hours 39 min ago view
  • it's a hell of a blockbuster, but it's for a guy who pitches 1/3rd of a season at an extreme premium considering the guy being traded and if the early extension $$$ rumors are true.

    it's one of those things that is bringing a guy at the top his game, but something is nagging me that this trade piece could have been put to better use.

    a huge part of me is all "hell yeah, top of the line producer"...another part of me is "hmm, that for that?"

    crunch 11 hours 42 min ago view