Alfonso Soriano and the Kaplan Conspiracy

LIfe is better when the Cubs win, but failure has a way of stoking a Cub fan's creativity, doesn't it? This dramatic reinterpretation of a call into David Kaplan's post-game "Tenth Inning" show is the work of WGN listener Edwardo, who was clearly inspired by Comedy Central's "Crank Yankers."

Comments

Wow. Kaplan isn't taking the canceling of Sports Central well.

No biggie. Kap wasn't very enjoyable after Tom Waddle left the show anyway. I do give him credit for airing a lot of Baseball Prospectus guys, though.

I also give him credit for having a panel of Cub bloggers on with him this past spring on Sports Central, including Andy from desipio.com, who has ripped on Kaplan often, enthusiastically, and to great comic effect.

To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan. Except maybe Les Grobstein, and Les is a different kind of sports radio guy. In fact, I think he is another species altogether.

"To be honest, I can't think of another Chicago sports radio guy I would rather listen to than Kaplan."

Tall midgets are still rather short.

He should have gotten them on with Ruben Amaro. The Phillies just made a guy who has ranked 27th and 49th among offensive players over the last two years the NL's highest paid player. Chase Utley must be salivating.

Moly Holy, that's a big contract to a big man. What will Prince Fielder get in free agency now?

A lot of green, that's for sure.

Vegan joke!!

Now there's something I never thought I would see: The word "inspired" in the same sentence as Comedy Central's Crank Yankers.

Long hair on Kaplan. :) haha

ss theriot, 2b baker, 1b lee, cf byrd, 3b ramirez, lf soriano, c soto, rf colvin, p silva

lefty going tonight in Lannan...

Maybe they're just trying to find playing time for Colvin? It doesn't seem like the best way to do it, but the Cubs have a surprising surplus of everyday outfielders right now.

Seeing if he can hit lefties I guess.

Pretty small sample size.

I just read somewhere that Lannan is AWFUL against lefties. Lefties are hitting over 500 against him, and righties are at about 250...
I wish I remembered where I read that... Obviously Lou didn't read it...
P.S. Here it is...
http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/gameday/index.jsp?gid=...

well if Lou read that, he'd play Fukudome, Colvin and Fontenot then today...

Wow. Just looked up his career splits:
in 1451 PAs by RHB: .257/.328/.384
in 463 PAs by LHB: .291/.357/.501

But the BABIPs are very different, .267 by RHB and .320 by LHB. How does that work when looking at pitchers? And the BB:K totals are more what you'd expect, 132:146 by RHB and 35:79 by LHBs, obviously LHB striking out much more frequently given the less than 1/3 as many PAs.

[Edit: He's really been rocked by lefties so far this year. Only 26 PAs, but .542/.538/.792 line for a 1.330 OPS. He's had reverse splits every year so far, which would seem to indicate the BABIP is the result of his pitching and not the result of luck.]

I was going to check Fangraphs for pitch types, then realize those are rarely accurate.

I believe Lannan's best pitch is his change-up, that tends to be down and in on a lefty in their happy zone, hence the troubles (possibly or it's just bad luck).

See how many breaking balls he throws Colvin I guess...

1. Nyjer Morgan, CF
2. Adam Kennedy, 3B
3. Cristian Guzman, 2B
4. Adam Dunn, 1B
5. Josh Willingham, LF
6. Ivan Rodriguez, C
7. Ian Desmond, SS
8. Willy Taveras, RF
9. John Lannan, P

Guzman batting 3rd, commence laughter

http://sports.espn.go.com/chicago/mlb/news/st...

Z says he was assured stay in pen is temporary until a trade can be made...

Z for Vernon Wells?

Har.

I wonder if Ryan Howard's new contract means that Hendry will let D Lee go after next year and try to swing a trade for Ryan Howard. I'm trying to think of an equally bad contract the Cubs have (scratches head).

you realize that scenario makes no sense. If the Phils wanted to move Howard, you don't sign him to an untradeable contract.

Oh, I know it doesn't make sense.

Makes no sense to me. I'd rather have Vernon Wells or Soriano under contract than Ryan Howard for 25 per year.

Probably at least a 10 million per year overpay.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/worklife/04/24...

If Lackey misses any significant time due to surgery on a pre-existing elbow injury during the first five years of the contract, the Red Sox gain a club option for the 2015 season in which Lackey would have to pitch for the major league minimum salary.

among others...

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

Is it me or is Big Z showing signs of serenity now and insanity later?

He pitched well tonight - I am sure it's not really, but it seems like the first 8th inning of the year that we didn't give up a run.

Just 2.5 back now with 142 to play!

Hoochie mamma!

~ata boy, Lloyd!~

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  • He also leads the NL in runs scored by 12 runs. But sure, no RBIs for a week, I feel it strong.

    John Beasley 19 min 35 sec ago view
  • Chapman

    So conflicted

    jacos 21 min 16 sec ago view
  • Torres a late scratch from the Pelicans game and no word of injury or signs of foul play with the unis. May be a trade a brewing after all?

    Edit: now word he was a late scratch due to a "headache". Hmmm

    Eric S 54 min 50 sec ago view
  • Hopefully Zobrist is regaining his stroke and KB can move back down to third or fourth in the order. Did not realize the zero rbi's in over a week - glad Rizzo and Russell picking up the slack

    Eric S 1 hour 3 sec ago view
  • Just had to ask, I guess.

    Haven't had a big comeback win in a long time (at least it seems like a long time). Great feeling!

    Rizzo should hold clinics on 2-strike hitting. Awesome.

    billybucks 2 hours 31 min ago view
  • cubs!!!!!

    cubs lead in the top 7th!

    crunch 3 hours 47 min ago view
  • so nastay...

    triple, walk, domination

    crunch 4 hours 3 min ago view
  • And he gets out of it by K-ing Braun, Lucroy and Carter!

    Let's get some runs!

    billybucks 4 hours 6 min ago view
  • welcome to the cubs j.nathan.

    2 pitches into the inning and there's a guy on 3rd with 0 outs (triple).

    his velocity is hanging around 91/92mph.

    crunch 4 hours 23 min ago view
  • Always a good idea to bring in Richard against a LH batter.

    billybucks 4 hours 45 min ago view
  • Russell left game with left heel contusion from foul ball on Saturday. Started to bother him during the Sunday game.

    Cubster 5 hours 1 min ago view
  • a.russell out and down into the clubhouse...no one knows why.

    it's very hot on the field, so it might be heat related.

    crunch 5 hours 21 min ago view
  • I blame the All-Star game again, or else Michael Barrett.

    Cubster 5 hours 34 min ago view
  • Miller park roof is closing. Hmmm, might play differently now?

    Lester at 72 pitches through 3. Roof closing might get him through 6.

    Middlebrows pulls a calf or hamstring. Len says he blew a tire rounding 1st. Nieuwenhuis enters game.

    Now roof opening. Dizziness. No AC in the ballpark wrt the field.

    Cubster 5 hours 35 min ago view
  • just to lighten the mood:
    Shark's day: 5.2 IP 5 Runs (all earned), 8 Hits, 2 HR. Left the game down 5-0 to Yankees.

    Anyone expecting game 4 NLCS Shark vs Hammel or Lackey?

    Cubster 5 hours 43 min ago view
  • First inning: two on, no out, Rizz and Zobrist due up. Don't score.
    Third inning: two on, one out, KB and Rizz due up. Don't score.

    This is getting' old, fellahs.

    billybucks 5 hours 44 min ago view