Sunday Funnies

Click on the image for the full-size cartoon and story...

You know, just when you think you've seen it all at Wrigley Field.

Somewhere around the 7th or 8th during an Astros game, I'm in the men's room.

I'm sure you've heard the descriptions or even been there, but the layout includes a sort of 5' tall wall in the center of the room, and along both sides are long, metal troughs.

So, you wouldn't call this a place with alot of privacy.

Etiquette demands you look up or maybe straight ahead at the guy across from you.

But out of the corner of my eye I thought the guy next to me was looking in a little mirror or something weird.

Couldn't help it.

I looked.

Guy was writing an email.

Just hangin' free, both hands emailing away and peeing at the same time.

He was so engrossed he didn't notice me staring.

On one hand, maybe it was admirable: not wasting baseball-viewing time with emailing.

On the other hand, he was probably on Twitter, writing "I am peeing in the men's room at Wrigley..."

But without either hand, it was just plain gross.

I scooched down away from him since I was wearing flip-flops.


 Tim Souers is the illustrator and author of Cubby Blue and appreciates the opportunity to guest blog here at The Cub Reporter.
http://www.cubby-blue.com

Comments

nice cartoon but if it is supposed to be Wrigley shouldn't there be an Alien or Predator type thing coming screaming out of the toilet and cutting his nads off with huge incisors?

He's got a hands-free device.

Ryno gets "Post of the Day" award!

didn't Illinois legislature just pass a law prohibiting this?

Illinois House Bill 71
This bill was approved by the House and Senate in May of 2009 and now (July of 2009) and just signed into law by the Governor. House Bill 71, titled "Use of Electronic Communication Devices While Peeing" on the National Conference of State Legislatures NCLS website amends the Illinois code to prohibit the use of electronic communication devices while trough urinating, specifically.

http://tinyurl.com/mabkhd

gotta like Tim's designs on this guy too...

http://www.cubby-blue.com/.a/6a00d83451fe4669e2011...

This one has always been my favorite:

http://www.cubby-blue.com/my_weblog/2009/06/sam-ze...

i was suppose to post that one last week, but techinical difficulties and me going on vacation prevented it.

Might it be a good idea for the Cubs to make a run at John Smoltz? He was DFA'd earlier this week.

True, he's been piss poor for the Red Sox this year, but he's been relatively effective the first time through the line up in his eight starts. Maybe he could be effective in the Cubs bullpen. Plus, he'd be cheap. Boston will be on the hook for the majority of his $5.5 million contract.

I don't know what it would take to get Smoltz, but I can't imagine it would be much.

Smoltz as a reliever? You're crazy. It'd never work.

You're right, TJ. I don't know what I was thinking.

Someone is going to have to help me on the rules surrounding DFAs. Does Smoltz have to accept the DFA? I'm almost positive he doesn't because of his year of service.

If he refuses the DFA, does he become a FA at that point? Once he's a FA, is Boston on the hook any longer for his contract?

I think my original thoughts were that once he was DFA'd, he could be dealt without clearing waivers. However, I think I was wrong.

Theriot, Bradley, DLee, Fox (3B), Fuku, Soriano, Baker, Hill and Wells

RICH HILL had his labrum surgery and as it turned out his shoulder wasn't as bad as previously thought once they got a look.

http://www.baltimoresun.com/sports/orioles/bal-ori...

terrible DP call costs Cubs a run...

Vintage Lou today on the ridiculous blown call on the double play in the second. Thanks umpires... not only can we not keep the team healthy, but we have the umpires playing against us too.

Cubs got Gucci-bagged and Lou got tossed...cost the cubs a run

3 innings 3 errors, Go Defense Go

17 hits
Bradley and Theriot combine for 6/10 at the top of the order
The 3,4,5 hitters all have two hit days
We get 5 doubles and a triple
7 hitters have multi-hit days

how do we turn all that into only 4 runs?

butt ugly today. if the team can't find a way to play .500 or better on the road, ain't no way they make the playoffs.

Re Sunday Funnies, wasn't this story posted once already?

If they can win tomorrow, they can still amazingly finish this trip 5-5. Feels more like 2-8.

I know it sucks to lose but maybe Bradley likes the 2 hole. Could be all good if they can hang in there.

BTW, I really hate the fucking Cardinals. I'd like to see St. Louis drop its dirty wad into the Mississippi and float into the gulf and get blown up by colliding into a fucking oil rig.

Other than that I'm feeling pretty well at peace.

It's funny how having far-and-away the best player in baseball tends to make your team a contender every year, regardless of what's around him. Sucks for us.

http://danny-knobler.blogs.cbssports.com/mcc/blogs...

also thinks WSox put claim in on Rios, Blue Jays won't move him unless they get something worthwhile for him. Retards.

Rays putting a lot of claims in on low-salary players to block Rsox/Yanks...

and please take a new photo Danny Knobler...

nice photo...harvey pekar approves.

I would really be shocked if Rios gets pulled off of waivers. They have Snider waiting. Maybe Riccardi just can't admit to himself that he made a bad deal.

http://espn.go.com/chicago/columns/blog?post=43872...

Levine says Lilly could be back the 17th, Z the 23rd...although he says Z could return when he's eligible to come off the DL, which in actuality is the 17th.

Submitted by Sweet Lou on Sun, 08/09/2009 - 12:00pm.

Someone is going to have to help me on the rules surrounding DFAs. Does Smoltz have to accept the DFA? I'm almost positive he doesn't because of his year of service.

If he refuses the DFA, does he become a FA at that point? Once he's a FA, is Boston on the hook any longer for his contract?

I think my original thoughts were that once he was DFA'd, he could be dealt without clearing waivers. However, I think I was wrong.

==============================

SWEET LOU: When a player is "Designated for Assignment" (DFA'd) it actually means he was placed on his club's Designated List. A player cannot refuse this assignment.

A player on the Designated List is removed from his club's MLB Active List (25-man roster) and MLB Reserve List (40-man roster), but continues to accrue MLB Service Time and continues to get paid while on the Designated List.

When a club places a player on the Designated List, it has ten days to either trade, release, or outright the player to the minors. (NOTE: If the player is not replaced on the 40-man roster by another player and if the player has minor league options remaining, he could be optioned to the minors, but that is rare).

During the ten days the player is on the Designated List, his club will try and trade the player and get something of value back in return (a player and/or cash). If the player isn't traded within ten days, the club has to place the player either on Outright Assignment Waivers or Outright Release Waivers, but if the player has at least five years of MLB Service Time, the player MUST be placed on Release Waivers because players with at least five years of MLB Service Time have the right to refuse an Outright Assignment to the minors and be returned to both the 25-man and 40-man roster, which obviously can't be done if the player was Designated for Assignment. (A player who is Designated for Assignment actually has to be traded within eight days, because it takes two days for a player to clear waivers).

Smoltz has way more than five years of MLB Service Time, so the Red Sox only option would be to trade or release him. So if Smoltz is not traded within eight days (and to get traded now he would also have to clear Trade Assignment Waivers because the July 31st non-waiver trade deadline has passed), he would have to be placed on Release Waivers.

If a player is placed on Release Waivers, he can be claimed for just $1 (one dollar), but the claiming club assumes 100% of the player's contract. Also, a player can decline a waiver claim off Release Waivers and become a free-agent, so players are almost never claimed off Release Waivers.

If a player is placed on Release Waivers and is not claimed, he becomes a free-agent and can sign with any club (this happened recently with B. J. Ryan), and the player's former club is responsible for paying the player's remaining salary minus the pro-rated portion of the MLB minimum salary that is paid by the player's new club.

AZPhil -- Thank you for the knowledge!

Recent comments

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  • Wow -- Chapman gives up a hit and everything completely caves in. I think the Cubs went into collective shock.

    Stolen base with the pitcher holding the ball, WP that should have been caught or blocked, then Russell with a 2-out error on a routine play. Cubs handed them 2 runs. Throw in a Fowler bobble and it was a mess.

    Hopefully, that is all out of their system now -- let's get a W tomorrow.

    billybucks 11 min 14 sec ago view
  • First time I've ever seen a base running slump -- he's made some poor decisions recently, but I thought it was a great idea to try to score there -- it's not like Heyward was going to get a 2-out hit against a LHP. Sliding feet-first into home is probably the safe (ugh) way to go, but it's hard to get the foot on the plate.

    billybucks 11 min 48 sec ago view
  • Yup. He got squeezed (twice) on the first walk, but, when you have one-run lead and the other team is trying to make an out -- take the out.

    billybucks 28 min ago view
  • Wasn't fun!

    Brick 32 min 22 sec ago view
  • Clearly the Cubs need to clear out the farm and trade for another closer

    Where's Ed Lynch when you need him?

    Eric S 33 min 44 sec ago view
  • Those were more entertaining times.

    Charlie 40 min 59 sec ago view
  • I wonder if there's an actual cause to this because they were going up hacking at everything. Wonder if scoring a bunch of runs makes you feel like you.can swing at anything and hit it.

    johann 47 min 45 sec ago view
  • That second walk he gave Up was awful though with no pitches even close to being a strike. He was trying to pitch around bunt and that almost never works. That said Rondon should have been brought in after the first walk and should have been left in to finish the inning because he was looking like he had good stuff.

    johann 1 hour 1 min ago view
  • Remember when Bryant used to be able to run the bases with impunity?

    CTSteve 1 hour 4 min ago view
  • And Miggy costs them another run

    Eric S 1 hour 11 min ago view
  • torres would easily be the system's #1 prospect. he's a middle IF'r that's showing he can stick there even as he's gaining bulk/muscle so far. that said, it's not like the distance between torres and jimenez is huge...it's torres's position value that would vault him in prospect status.

    jimenez has the higher ceiling just isolating the bat aspect of his game.

    it would suck to lose either, but torres is a very popular/valuable piece.

    crunch 1 hour 11 min ago view
  • Arrieta in line to lose the game too

    Cruel game

    Eric S 1 hour 12 min ago view
  • ...and chapman fails us. gives up the lead. boo.

    crunch 1 hour 13 min ago view
  • bringing in rondon to try to put out this fire is a nice luxury.

    crunch 1 hour 21 min ago view
  • Complete craziness bottom seven. Bottom line Cubs were fortunate to score a run

    And of course Arrieta walks the first two batters in the eighth (to be fair he was totally squeezed on Zunino's walk to start the inning)

    Eric S 1 hour 24 min ago view
  • ...and the no hitter is over in the 7th...2 on, 0 out.

    crunch 1 hour 47 min ago view